I've usually been pretty good at reading people and figuring out what kind of person they are. I've also been pretty good on not allowing pretty much anyone get a good read on me. Whenever I actually truly let my guard down and let someone in, I get hurt in the end. Its a never ending cycle.
You can't pick your family but you can choose your friends. Sometimes you have to sell yourself to others to show that your worth a friendship. It works sometimes, but if they are too naive to see it, then they get to miss out.
I used to study psychology because it really truly interested me on how people act the way that they do. That along with socialism you can get a lot from a person in just one conversation. Its neat to see once you understand what your looking at on how everyone is truly different. How our brains deflect different outcomes in same situations. There also those moments still that I can't figure out why people act the way they do or say the things that they say. Especially when I did get a chance to know a little bit about them and then their actions speak differently then what I originally thought. Its frustrating....especially when their actions are hurting me.
You can't pick your family but you can choose your friends. Sometimes you have to sell yourself to others to show that your worth a friendship. It works sometimes, but if they are too naive to see it, then they get to miss out.
I used to study psychology because it really truly interested me on how people act the way that they do. That along with socialism you can get a lot from a person in just one conversation. Its neat to see once you understand what your looking at on how everyone is truly different. How our brains deflect different outcomes in same situations. There also those moments still that I can't figure out why people act the way they do or say the things that they say. Especially when I did get a chance to know a little bit about them and then their actions speak differently then what I originally thought. Its frustrating....especially when their actions are hurting me.
I know I'm a good person. I've done a lot of dumb things in my life but I still have value. I still have faith and I have a big heart. When someone that actually got to see those things of me and then neglects those attributes and lies to everyone around them, then I don't get it. I don't understand the psychology of it. I tried to. I looked up everything I possible could in my past studies. I found nothing. The last thing I want to do is just characterize this person to just be plain horrible but at this point its all I got. I got screwed over in more ways then one, treated like a psychopath, left with positive test results that I had to deal with on my own along with the tornado of chaos that cascaded throughout my family. All from one person. One person that I cared for and let my guard down with, did all of this. Before I would say I would take mutual responsibility for certain actions. Now I'm looking at it as 1/3.
I'm probably not making any sense to you all. Unless you know the whole story it wouldn't make sense and I'm not going to get in all the details because well I just don't want to deal with it anymore. I'm done being hurt. I'm done being confused and I'm definitely done being attacked by people that are walking around with lies in their head because their best friend even admitted to me that he was incapable of telling them the truth.
So I'm not going to always understand everything. I'm not always going to have an answer to every question. I get it. I truly do. I'm just trying to move forward but yet a handful of people just won't allow it.
I'm in a good place now. My heart is back to where its supposed to be. My head is getting there. I'm moving forward whether you like it or not. Karma does show its ugly head for those that pester so just remember that "The three amigos."
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